Issue #96

Castle, Charity, and Faith and Humility

by Ian Seed

Castle

On the country bus, I got talking to a young couple. Did they know about the castle with its historical re-enactments? That was worth seeing. In fact, this bus should arrive near the castle soon. I asked the conductor how many stops, but he knew nothing about the castle. Perhaps in about thirty stops, another passenger, a man in a flat-top cap suggested. That seemed a bit far to me. Better we get off sooner and try and walk there, I suggested. But it was already growing dark, the young woman said. For some reason, she was almost in tears. Are you all right? I asked. The young man told me her father had been murdered in that very castle some years ago in front of her eyes when she was a child. Later she had been tormented by the family of the murderer, as if it were all her fault that their father was in prison. The man and his wife had even written a book about it together, and were now looking for a publisher. You need to have a backup plan, I suggested, just in case the first publisher you try rejects it. They looked at me in disbelief, then turned away to look out of the window, where there was now a panoramic view of the castle bathed in a red sunset.

***

Charity

At the second-hand record fair, I came across Dr Feelgood's I was looking back to see if she was looking back to see if I was looking back at her. It was priced at £50, much more expensive than the other albums there. I felt like a fool. I'd given that album away to charity decades ago and missed it ever since. There was an old-fashioned mono record player on the stall and I asked the man if he'd play the title track for me. The song was not as I recalled; it sounded more like a cover version than the original. Was that because it was so long since I'd heard it? I picked up the album cover to inspect it more closely and saw my handwritten name in one corner on the back. I was thinking of walking away, but when I looked up, I saw the man was already preparing a bag for me and smiling in anticipation of the £50.

***

Faith and Humility

The bishop gave his talk, and afterwards those who had reserved a place, at a certain price, had the privilege of joining him for dinner in one of the university's finest historical rooms. He sat at the head of a centuries-old table, and between mouthfuls of food cracked one increasingly vulgar joke after another, much to the amusement of his distinguished audience. There was a question I had wanted to ask him during the talk, but there hadn't been time. I waited now for what seemed ages for an opportune moment. It was only towards the end of dinner, while coffee with liquor was being served, that the table went quiet and I managed to stammer out, 'Isn't humility a part of faith, too?' But at the moment I began speaking so did the bishop in his booming voice, and as I finished my question, everyone burst out laughing at his latest witticism.